


Alone

by Angst_Witch (seriousfangirl97)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alone, F/M, Other, Well damm, angst with a happy?, does this count as angst?, ending, i think it does, that ending gets you angsty doesn't it?, that title is angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-29
Updated: 2016-10-29
Packaged: 2018-08-27 15:40:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8407327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seriousfangirl97/pseuds/Angst_Witch
Summary: I never had a best friend. People come and go, and they leave me behind. They never had second thoughts, I never got second chances... 
Then came one person





	

**Author's Note:**

> There's always a little bit of the author behind every FanFiction, you just have to see from the writer's perspective.
> 
> Be it a feeling, a desire, a dream, or a question, there's a bit of the writer there. You just have to open your eyes a bit. 
> 
> Remember to appreciate that author for sharing a piece of them with you, no matter how "good" or "bad" their writing skills are. They're letting you into their mind, and soul. (Just a random reminder after seeing an artist lose interest in her art due to lack of appreciation.)

_I never had a best friend._

 

_Yeah, I've got cousins that were like siblings, but even they have best friends._

 

_No one to play with during my childhood, no one to talk to about "secrets" things. I've been alone in that sense. Instead I watched other people and_ **_their_ ** _best friends. Hanging out, having the time of their life with_ **_each other_ ** _; people and their best friends were all around me._

 

_People come and go, and they leave me behind. They_ **_never_ ** _had second thoughts, I never got second chances._

 

_After a while, I accepted it. I accepted that it was easy for me to make friends, but hard for me to keep them. Although I had accepted it, I wouldn't have a best friend, I still had questions. I still wondered._

 

_Why was I constantly pushed aside? What made them go away? Why did no one stay, no matter how hard I tried to  get them to stay? What was wrong with me? Did no one want me?_ **_WHY?_ **

 

_Too many people have told me not to  "Don't ever change" It started in the second grade. I had no intention to change. But what if I did? Would I have gotten a best friend sooner? The funny thing was that this phrase, "Don’t ever change" came from people my age and older. Why did they say this? If they liked the way I was, why did they never stay? Was I never really good enough and made them feel better about themselves?_

 

**_WHY!?_ ** _I'm sitting in front of a group of kids, all of them my age, talking and laughing with each other, none of them have noticed me sitting in a corner of this classroom, the teacher's given us free time for the second time this week. None of them noticed me, except for_

 

"Hi, why're you sitting here all alone? What're you writing?"

 

I looked up at him, a tear falling onto my cheek.

 

His eye's widened, immediately reaching forward and wiping the tear away. "Whoa! what's wrong, Hange!? That's your name right? That's what the teacher calls you, anyways..."

 

I nodded, more tears falling, a snicker from a nearby student, causing me to duck my head. I was frowning, almost sneering.

 

"Well Hange, I don't know what's wrong, but want me to stay here with you? Those guys are idiots anyways."

 

I stopped sneering, looking up at him with eyes wet from the tears. "Why? H-Hey! That's mine, don't read it!"

 

I tried to pry my journal from him, but to no avail. Although we were the same age, and height sitting, he was stronger than me.

 

"Never? You've never had a best friend?" He said almost in disbelief. "But you're so smart, and I've seen how kind you are to some of the kids here… How can you _not_ have a best friend!? Hey I know... I'll be your best friend!"

 

"What? Really!? I-I don't even know your name…"

 

"It's Erwin. Erwin Smith." He said with a smile, handing my journal back to me.

 

"Erwin Smith… It's really nice to meet you… Um, my name is Zoë Hange" I said quietly, cautiously offering my hand to him.

 

"Zoë? That's a nice name."

 

It was the first time some one actually initiated a friendship with me; it was always me speaking first, and usually over classwork. Becoming acquainted with Erwin was refreshing for me, though I didn't expect him to stay for long.

 

But he did stay. We chatted there, in that corner of the classroom, until the teacher told us it was time for our math lesson. Even as the students took their seats, Erwin stayed beside me. There were snickers from a few of the people he was with prior; these kids were part of the popular kids in the eighth grade. They were the ones who ruled the halls, and tortured whoever crossed their path.

 

Erwin was best friends with one of them, his name was Nile Dawk, I believe. They were best friends until they got into an argument. One over me.

 

After that day, Erwin stopped talking to him, focusing on me and school, "The **important** things." he would always tell me.

 

I **was** alone.

Then came one person, and he stayed. He stayed after that fateful day in eighth grade, and got closer to me like he promised.

His name is Erwin Smith, and I love him.

 

… I think.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this to vent on how I felt after discovering a person I respected would rather not talk to me. I didn't want to bother the closest person I have to a best friend, Melissa, because It was too late at night for her and I didn't know if she was awake. As I wrote this, She messaged me, and boosted my feelings, thanks bestie ^-^


End file.
